In sooth i know not why i am so sad.

I'm a sad panda lately and i'm not sure why. I feel like i don't really have someone good to talk to about life. Don't get me wrong, i adore my friends and can talk to them, but not about my home life or shit that bothers me. I think i need a therapist. Mad shit just erks me lately. And i feel like shit constantly. I truly hate how life is a game of appearances. It's a game that quite frankly i will never win. There's always someone skinnier, prettier, and more stylish than you. And that's life. There's always that girl that your boyfriend would rather be with. And then it's like, well why is he with me? And not these other more perfect girls? It makes no sense. I want to be done with this life. and reincarnated into a better more fulfilled one.

Coffeee

I want your opinions!
Starbucks coffee or dunkin donuts?
I personally prefer starbucks java chips. But DD's coffe.

So long Astoria.

So i havent updated in forever. Boo, sorry. ): i have a lot to update about! I moved! I love my new town and place, my room is awesome. ill make a post about it laterr. And I got a job! Its this place called Primas. The people are so chill and its really laid back. I love it. Hmmmm lets see. Today i woke up at 8 am to go to the grand opening of forever 21 in our mall. Me and Alexa got freee gift cards! I got these sick ass glasses.<3 theyre like metal legs and all vinage! I adore them. But i also got a tube top which is super cute. Then i went to barnes and noble! I got a new james patterson book and an ellen hopkins book i love her work. I also saw this bag and it made me thing of my best friends!<3 It said "My best friend is the kind of friend who would give me a book i never read"

Im sick of smiling. and so is my jaw

So yesterday i was talking to my friend Andrew and asked him about his girlfriend. and so i was like well is she skinny, and he was like yeah shes like your size! He knows the way to a girl's heart. Anyhoo, bamboozle is soon. thirty days i believe. You know what that means?! My birthday is soon! (: but this year i get to spend my whole birthday weekend in DC watching my sister graduate. woo fucking hoo. Can never be just about me can it? NOPE. If anyone wants to be a doll, they'll buy me this for my birthday



Ill love youre guts til the end of time. I want it to take cutepictures with my boyfriend. and other people, then line my wall with them. =] similar to mitchell Davis. anyhoo. OH, if you love me again, youll get me this for my birthday:



I want it, so i can put lame ass clinky phone charms on it (: woohooo. or you cant vuy me a cat! Make that two, Cyrus JR, and muffins. Whatever, im out.

Me is in.

Lol people are so immature. I love it.

It's funny how your worst enemies always seem to
turn out to be all of your
best friend's best friends
But I folded and I told
These aren't things I saved to sink you
but I folded, I told
So draw or throw and I will explode

It's time for you to choose
the bullet or the chapstick
And you are far too cute or whatever he said

Every time I hear it I am wishing I was great
I wish her... past tense my best friend
But I folded and I told
These aren't things I say to save me
But I folded, I told
I hope she's caught in the explosion

It's time for you to choose
the bullet or the chapstick
And you are far too cute or whatever he said

It's time for you to choose
It's time for you to choose
the bullet or the chapstick
This is me in his room
This is me in his room
This is me in his room

Red, gold, I told
We don't play fair
Red, gold, I told
We never stand too close

So I update this almost every single day for you
I begin to hate you for your face and not just the things you do
Go tell him how my wrist is sore
from pulling at your insides all night
Nothing that you do is new to anything or anyone but you

Infinite

I have plenty of friends, but i've come to realize that i only have a few people i consider to be really good friends. Sometimes it makes me sad that i dont have that group of people who are all friends and all hang out. But i enjoy hanging out with all my friends seperately. I've also realized that all of my friends are very different, and i talk to each of them about very different things. Dana, i talk to about everything, except like alot of shit at home. Bub, i talk to about life ahaha, but he's also the only person i actually tell my at home problems to, mad trust in bub. Nicole and Sami i talk about the most typical things. Like guys, and dumb shit in my life. Jon, i trust with everything, and he is one of my best friends, but i dont talk to him about anything... Idk why but i feel like he would think im like a pussy or something, and i just hate seeming like vulnerable i guess? Idk.. whatever

If you've got a quarter, you can stick it my neck.

God i miss saves the day, they have got to be one of the greatest bands known to man(: ho hum, today was a pretty shit day. I can never find a nice outfit. Soo, i looked like shit and lost my favorite lipgloss which immediately put me in a bad mood. I learned, that i am a bitch hahaha. Sami and Nikki said i'll say anything about anyone without caring, which is true so i guess that makes me a bitch? whatevs. Im a go hard gym player. But today we were getting lectured about being late, so i was mocking the teacher and he mocked me back. And he got in like a pissing contest with me i was like lol wut!? Then as i continued, he said i was rude and nasty and he has no respect for me! I was dying. He can suck it! Lolll so when i get home i was talking to jon and his best friend and his gf were arguing about something. And i was like saying how i get what shes saying and coming from and he was like whatever. LAWLZ. I love this kid, but i swear he hates me, i really think he does. I dont blame him, i'm a dickk. whatever! Ho hum, im waiting for Andres to get tha fuck online so we can vchat! wtff So i added mad keychains to my keyring, its huge now I want a LV tote bag SOOOO BADDDDD. )): Ill write more laterrr im sleepy